Bullying is a controversial issue that has been constantly addressed by the media. Bullying is a form of ongoing abuse characterized by harassment and verbal, emotional, or physical violence. It can also be seen as a strong assertion of power and control through aggression. Although it is a very current issue, bullying has always existed, exists, and will always exist. The bigger problem today is how it is perceived and tackled by society.
We know that the psychological effects of bullying are devastating and that it manifests in various forms and sizes. However, nowadays any teasing, offense, or unfunny joke has been considered bullying. Even worse, there is a tendency for parents to ‘jump in front’ of their children to protect them, thus not allowing them to learn to face their own problems. I’m not saying here that parents shouldn’t intervene when their children are victims of bullying. What I advocate for is recognizing the thin line that separates bullying from everyday conflicts in a child or adolescent’s life, to know when external interference, whether from family or school, is necessary.
Recently, a 14-year-old boy shot classmates in the city of Goiânia. The media’s justification was that the boy was bullied. We have to consider whether, being bullied or not, what led this boy to kill was not his inability to deal with his problems, a lack of coping mechanisms that were not incorporated into his personality during childhood. The vast majority of today’s parents, wanting to protect their children at all costs, end up solving everything for them, involving them in a bubble, believing they are sparing them from any suffering.
Conflict is part of life at any stage, and it is extremely necessary to allow the child to face their own conflicts so that they develop ways to deal with them. Once they are spared from such conflicts, they grow up without the fundamental tools that will help them survive in the jungle of life. And this explains the high rates of depression, violence, and suicide among young people worldwide today. Therefore, parents, protect your children by teaching them how to deal with bullying, encouraging them to face their problems, and giving them autonomy to make their own choices. Remember that there will come a time when you won’t be there to protect them, and they will only survive if they have learned to do it for themselves.
Thais Clemente